Courageous Leadership Skills: Don’t Be Strong
“The gold is in the dark.”
Carl Jung
Take a good look at what’s going on
In the face of fear, when courage fades, our reaction can be to put that fear and anxiety aside and face the challenge and take it on.
Be Strong! Gird your loins! Dig Deep! Conquer the monster!
However, there is wisdom and resource to be found in turning towards the fear rather than turning away from it.
Chose “Box B”
Looking at the fear and checking out what’s really going on can open up new wisdom and help you find new strength and courage. Looking at the fear squarely and connecting with it can in fact be the act that transforms the fear.
This is not an easy thing to do. Not only does looking at the scary thing involve … well, looking at the scary thing.
In turning from the light to look into the shadow, we’ll also see some of our limitations, our vulnerabilities, our insecurities.
And of course, the benefit of doing that is you get to see some of your limitations, your vulnerabilities and insecurities.
Seeing the truth of the situation opens up the possibility of courage.
Seeing the truth of who you are opens up the possibility of courage.
Putting it into practice
As you feel fear coming and courage leaving, slow down, slow right down.
(Breathe. Breathe.)
Perhaps move away from where you normally do your work, so you’re not in the literal space of being busy.
(Breathe. Breathe.)
Take some breaths, deep ones to bring oxygen to your brain
and a sense of calm to your body.
(Breathe. Breathe.)
Where are you noticing the fear?
What’s the message you’re hearing in your head?
(Breathe. Breathe.)
Where do you notice it in your body?
If it was an object, what would it look like? Feel like?
(Breathe. Breathe.)
Stay with it. Don’t rush away. Stay with it.
(Breathe. Breathe.)
And as you do, notice what’s changing. How’s the message in your head
evolving? How’s the feeling in your body transforming?
(Breathe. Breathe.)
And what are you noticing at the heart of this fear?
(Breathe. Breathe.)
What are you noticing that’s true? How does that change things?
(Yes, keep breathing).
This post brings into the light that fear is typically closely connected to uncertainty about consequences and in that position, an exaggeration of potential costs in the form of a fuzzy dark-and-stormy mental concept. Seeking clarity with a closer and conscious look at what is really out there is more constructive than the typical intuitive exaggeration of the potential negative outcome.