Outside the Lines - Michael Bungay Stanier

Superheroes
Michael Bungay Stanier

One of the best books I've read is All My Friends are Superheroes. Tom - our protagonist - realises that everyone in his life has their own super power. The woman he loves is known as The Perfectionist. His jealous rival, Hypno, has convinced her that Tom doesn't exist. In his journey to win her back, we meet superheroes like The Frog-Kisser (blessed with the ability to turn geeks into winners); the Stress Bunny (with the ability is to absorb the stress of everyone in a fifty-foot radius); and the Couch Surfer (who can sustain life and limb without a job or permanent place of residence).

All My Friends are Superheroes It's a sweet and funny love story. It also starts you thinking about what your own friends' superhero powers might be (I am very lucky to know two, The Acid Test, and The Black Sheep). In this Outside the Lines I'll look at our own hero's journey, and celebrate the heroes in our lives.

I had a superhero moment of my own last month as I had the honour of being named the inaugural Canadian Coach of the Year while at the International Coach Federation conference in San Jose. Thank you to Coaches Canada, the sponsor of the award.

Know anyone who's got their own special powers? Please forward Outside the Lines (in its entirety please) to anyone you think might be interested. This community grows with your help.

I'd be delighted if you should wish to reprint (for free) any part of Outside the Lines in your newsletters, websites, and message boards. Contact me at Michael@BoxOfCrayons.biz for further details.

Michael Bungay Stanier
Principal, Box of Crayons

"I believe it is the nature of people to be heroes, given the chance."
James Autry

"Heroes and cowards feel exactly the same fear. Heroes react differently, that's all."
Gus D'Amato

"Men are not given awards and promotions for bravery in intimacy."
Gail Sheehy

"I think of a hero as someone who understands the degree of responsibility that comes with their freedom."
Bob Dylan

"The greatest obstacle to being heroic is the doubt whether one may not be going to prove one's self a fool; the truest heroism is, to resist the doubt; and the profoundest wisdom, to know when it ought to be resisted, and when to be obeyed."
Nathaniel Hawthorne

...have proven to be exactly that: irresistible! In the three weeks since I launched this funky short movie, more than 10,000 people in 72 countries have seen it. Different principles have struck a different chord for different people. For some it's Principle Four: Start Scaring Yourself. For others, Principle Seven: Stop Being Busy.

So check it out: www.eightprinciples.com. And if you like what you see - and I think you will - please pass it along!

Due to popular demand, we are going to offer copies of the movie on CD for the same price as the card set. We will send a message out to our readers when it has been added to the Get Unstuck & Get Going website.

Joseph Campbell first described the Hero's Journey, recognizing it as the basic blueprint for all stories, including the one we live in our own life. (And in this article, I'll acknowledge three of my own heroes).

There are basically three stages to the Hero's Journey. The first is the Departure. It is when the hero first hears the call to adventure - the first hint that something is going to change. Often the call is initially refused - the notion of leaving the safety of what is known is too scary to contemplate. But the call persists, and eventually the hero - often with the help of a Mentor - accepts the call and crosses the threshold into this new and special world to begin the journey.

I've started to recognize when I get "the call". Whether it's a new idea for a product, starting a new project with a client, or talking about what we want to do with our lives with my wife, I get a little rush of excitement in my chest. I sit up and lean forward. I often get up and walk around, because I'm feeling both nervous and excited. If it's a BIG call to a BIG adventure, my right leg starts to jiggle - driving everyone crazy! (What signs do you recognize in your own body, when you get a call to adventure?)

A hero in the world:
Peter Benenson, the founder of Amnesty International. Benenson died this year. He founded Amnesty in 1961 with the objective of rendering the darkness of the political prisoner's cell more visible to public challenge. Sixteen years later, Amnesty was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize, and has a worldwide membership of 1.8 million.

The second stage of the Hero's Journey is the adventure itself. On the road to the goal, they will face tests and enemies, and will conquer them with the help of allies. The allies may show up as a "sidekick" or they may show up as a team. The hero may stumble and fall and victory may (more than once) be snatched from their grasp. But slowly and surely the Hero learns the ways of this new world, and comes closer to their goal. The Hero faces the final ordeal - the nemesis - and conquers it. The Quest is won!

Heroes from the people I know:
Any number of the people with whom I've worked this year, who've taken a stand for something, gone to the edges of their own skills and courage, who've taken a risk. For some it has been accepting a new role within their work, for some the transition to a new job or even starting a new business. All of them have been heroes.

This is the stage I love - the rush to overcome hurdles, find possibilities, and generate solutions. It's also the place I sometimes get lost. If I haven't fully defined my goal - why exactly AM I doing this? - it becomes a place of frantic busy-ness, exhaustion, and endless striving. As for my nemesis, the one I bump into most often is me, and in particular of the 'would someone show up and rescue me, please because I don't want to do this any more' variety.

The final stage of the Hero's Journey is the journey back. Again, there will be challenges to overcome, enemies to face, allies to call upon for help. Crossing the threshold back to the 'real world' can be tricky - will the Hero be able to bring back the newfound wisdom and experience and share it? But it is often in this final stage that the real transformation occurs.

For anyone like me - a better starter than finisher - this part of the journey can be particularly tricky. It's also crucial. This part of the journey is often about 'bedding in' the changes made from the first stages. This is where you reinforce the change in behaviour, the change in perspective, the change in role that you fought so hard to gain. These obstacles can feel more mundane - but here also lies the process that transforms new gains to everyday habits. This is the connection to 'the real world.'

One of the heroes within my family:
My brother Gus and his family have just returned from his second stint at teaching within an aboriginal community in the far north of Australia. Ngkurr is like many aboriginal communities around the world, trying to find the best way forward in a way that acknowledges their traditions and the pressures of modern day life. Gus & Jane's willingness to be active in the search for the solution, rather than just on-lookers, make them heroes to me.

Andrew Kaufman, All My Friends are Superheroes. Sweet and marvellous, give it to your superhero friends. It will make you laugh - and set you off on a quest to find your own friends' superhero powers. [buy: CA US UK]

Joseph Campbell, The Hero with a Thousand Faces. Campbell was the mythologist who described The Hero's Journey, the "ur-story" that is behind all stories. [buy: CA US UK]

The Hero's Journey. You can see a summary of the stages of the hero's journey here.

Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, On Death and Dying. Kubler-Ross's description of the mourning process has been recognized as the process we all go through when we face change: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance (although commonly known as the five stages of Grief, it was actually presented as the five stages to receiving catastrophic news). It echoes the shape of the Hero's Journey. [buy: CA US UK ]

The Action Acceleration Sheet. This worksheet is structured along the lines of the Hero's Journey. You can download it for free at www.GetUnstuckAndGetGoing.com It's at the bottom, right hand side of the page.

2005 has been a wonderful year for me, and I have my own heroes to thank. Here are the people who directly contributed to the work I did in 2005. I can recommend each and every one to you as great practitioners of their art.

And the surprised woman? My life and business partner, Marcella - who is magnificent, and she tells me, not one bit surprised.

Get Unstuck & Get Going free teleforum. Monday December 19, 2pm EST. A regular forum I host for this community, to support you in getting unstuck. Register by sending an email to admin@BoxOfCrayons.biz.

Get Unstuck & Get Going free teleforum, ICF Virtual Chapter. Monday January 9, 7pm EST. Register by sending an email to admin@BoxOfCrayons.biz with ICF Virtual in the subject line.

Branding & Business Models for coaches. London, England, Saturday January 21. I've paired these two three-hour workshops together for an event sponsored by the London Coaching Group. For more details and how to register go to http://www.londoncoachinggroup.co.uk/events

Get Unstuck & Get Going public workshop. London, England. Sunday, January 22. Place and cost to be confirmed. Please email me if you might be interested at Michael@BoxOfCrayons.biz

Florida Creativity Weekend, February 24-26, Sarasota, FL. Find out more information here: FLCreativity3@aol.com.

As you might be able to guess, I love to speak or run workshops for groups! Please get in touch if you think I may be able to serve you or your organization as a professional keynote speaker.

If you're going to give gifts these holidays, make sure it's something that matters. You might consider:

The Eight Irresistible Principles of Fun. A funky compact card set of the movie that's taken the Internet by storm. Buy online here.

Get Unstuck & Get Going ...on the stuff that matters. The self-coaching tool that helps you get yourself unstuck. "Stuck" is when you can see the situation only one way - and you don't like what you see. Get Unstuck & Get Going lets you generate over 125,000 new possibilities to get you moving again (and includes a ten part e-course, to make sure you get the most from it). Anita Roddick, founder of the Body Shop, calls it "a powerful call to get going on the work that matters." And David Taylor, author of The Naked Leader, calls it "refreshing, powerful and original." See what the fuss is about here.

A "buy the store" special - a copy of Get Unstuck & Get Going, a pad of Action Acceleration Sheets and the Eight Irresistible Principles of Fun card set at 15% off the full price. Available at the Get Unstuck store.

This month, there will be no 'The Scribbler', the sister publication to Outside the Lines as we'll all be off having fun over the holidays. Look for your next issue of Outside the Lines on January 12th, 2006.

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